Thursday, October 3, 2013

Peppermint tea

I've been watching the weather trying to figure out if flights will be cancelled tomorrow. It looks like I may have a chance at getting out on time, due to my location. I don't fancy the idea of trying to take off in wind gusting up to 30 to 40 mph on the ground, let alone who knows what in the jet stream. So I've also been watching the wind forecasts. I like flying better in the day time, in low wind, nonstop, and when landings are smooth (I think this is typically in the winter when there is less humidity at the ground? Dunno). I like to try to make things easier on myself when I'm doing something I don't like to do (flying), so typically I try to choose those options. I'm so glad I spent the extra $200 for 2 nonstop flights.

When I was even more afraid of flying as a teenager and young adult, I also used to fly first class in a coping mechanism that I like to call "classical conditioning". I pampered myself in first class, with calming drugs (legal), and all the food and (free) drinks I wanted in first class. That way, I sort of came to think, "Hmm, flying's not all bad!" And it got easier for me from there on out. It was very smart and effective of me. I also learned that you just need to let go and focus on something else like writing something -- it can't be reading, it has to be something to take your FULL attention like reading mathematical formulas or doing analysis on SPSS. This time around I was reading about squared semipartial correlations in determining effect size of interaction effects. It took my mind off of the flight. Another strategy I use is imagining how much smoother the flight is than many roads -- bumps in the air are just "air gravel", as I refer to them in my head. When we have turbulence I just repeat, "Air gravel. Air gravel." A final thing I'll mention is that I tell myself, "This is so fun! This is fun." Whenever I start to get scared. Even though I don't believe it, I try to take a page out of the smile literature that says you can increase your mood by just smiling -- the old theory that emotion is caused by interpretations of your behaviors (and in my case, my thoughts). You see yourself smiling, so you interpret that you must be happy. I hear myself saying this is fun, and I interpret that maybe I am having fun! It seems to be doing good things for me.

Back to today. I've made some good choices today:

  • Slept in for another 1.5 hours this morning, longer than I was planning to.
  • Twice I chose not to get calorie-laden beverages that sounded amazing (a variety of seasonal flavored lattes that sound amazing and have whipped cream).
  • Picked up healthy food for dinner and breakfast tomorrow from the grocery store rather than eating out (which had been my plan). Got a ready-made spinach salad with cranberries, glazed pecans, feta, and balsamic. Some curry cashews, and a banana. Got Greek yogurt, Amy's tofu/pea/rice meal, and a bowl of strawberries, raspberries, and blueberries for breakfast.
  • Took a 45-minute nap tonight which I awoke from feeling surprisingly awake and good.
  • Went back to coffee shop to keep on track so I can study for about 4 more hours tonight.
  • Picked up my parking permit for tomorrow so that I don't have to worry about that before my meeting tomorrow.
I will probably take a long nap tonight, based on how awake I'm feeling. I don't really feel tired. I wonder what I did during the nap that made me feel so good. Usually I feel really groggy after naps. I guess I picked the right amount of time.

The only bad thing right now is that I feel this very strong squeezing in the bottom of my throat, below the collarbone. It comes on all of a sudden and usually stays for 15 minutes to a couple hours. It's incredibly distracting because it feels like you're choking or like something's blocking your throat. It's these waves of intense squeezing. I don't know what causes it. The only thing I've ever noticed as a potential cause would be eating too quickly. I'm a really slow eater naturally. I ate my dessert tonight quickly because it is quiet like a library in here and I wanted to get it over with so I didn't bother the people here, so I ate quicker than normal. I wonder if that's what caused it... Well, it's been going on a while so I have an appointment for a procedure to get it looked at later this month so hopefully they'll rule out anything that could be problematic.

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